Be healthy, feel good, and enjoy a freaking cookie!!

I have been having a difficult time lately finding a happy food balance in my life. One day I eat perfectly clean and work out and feel great and then the next I cave and eat whatever junk I can get my hands on and then am incredibly hard on myself. I then convince my eyes and my mind that because I ate poorly my stomach grew 3 inches and that I ultimately look gross (even though my clothes still fit.)

After texting back and forth with a friend I realized that I just need to stop this. It is not healthy, it is not fun, and it is really not making me a happy person. I am not someone who can give up all foods and eat clean 24/7. As I have established before, I really do love food. It is something that I grew up with by having my family in the restaurant business and it is a part of who I am. However, that doesn't mean I need to give up and not care about what I eat either, because well, I know it can be a downward spiral.

I do really well in the morning time. I wake up, work out (most days) and then make myself a green protein smoothie. The contents change from day to day as to what is in the smoothie but 6 out of 7 mornings this is what I do for breakfast. I am not a coffee drinker but I have really become obsessed with making the homemade version of Starbucks Iced Green Tea (unsweetened). It is a perfect amount of caffeine and cold and refreshing for these nice warm mornings we have had lately. Around 9:30/10:00am I am ready for a snack. When I have healthy options on hand, I easily go for them. A handful of almonds with some raisins mixed in, any flavor of a Larabar, or even carrots with hummus. If we do not have healthy snacks on hand, I pretty much eat whatever seems quickest. It does not fail that every day around 2:00 is when the cravings begin. I just want to eat anything and honestly everything that is sweet or junky in my house. I typically have my lunch either at 12:00pm with the kids or I will wait until 1:00 and eat once they are down for naps (sometimes its just nice to eat by myself without someone nabbing half of my meal). No matter what time I have my lunch though, the craving always hits around 2:00. I have never had an addiction to cigarettes or alcohol or anything of that sort but its almost like my body or brain releases something that tells me to go and eat unhealthy foods at the same time everyday and I cannot seem to stop the craving. I have tried drinking water or more tea to tell myself I am not hungry. I have tried to just resist the urge, but most days I just cave. As I have said before the whole "just eat one bite" or "moderation is key" that is all BS to my brain.

All playdates should begin with donuts, right?!

Most nights I cook. I'd say 5 out of the 7 nights, and I typically focus on making a healthy meal. Protein with veggies, salad and baked small red potatoes, spaghetti squash, some form of tacos with whatever protein we have on hand, etc. Josh is an adventurous eater as long as onions are not involved so we try to make fun new healthy foods quite often. This week I made a "skinny" version of fettuccine alfredo with spaghetti squash as our noodles and a sauce that does not contain a stick of butter and whole milk and it was surprisingly delicious!! However, when we decide to indulge we go out with a bang. The other night we ordered the Domino's box that came with a pizza, bread sticks and cinnamon sticks. Let's just say it was freaking awesome and we will leave the details behind how much we consumed out of that box to your imaginations =).

A few things we have really changed in our diets are first off cutting out cow's milk. The kids drink either almond milk or coconut milk and that is what we add to our smoothies as well. Occasionally we will use cow's milk if a recipe calls for it and I feel as if our alternatives will not be a good substitute. We have cut back on our consumption of cheese a lot. A sprinkle on a baked potato or a sprinkle on top of a taco is about all we really do. We always do whole wheat noodles,when we actually eat noodles and not spaghetti squash. At the beginning of the week we try and grill up a few packages of chicken to add to our meals, hard boil some eggs to eat for breakfast/snacks/salads, and my favorite is when we take a medley of vegetables, chop them up, put them on a baking sheet, cover them in a tiny bit of oil/salt/pepper/seasonings and grill them. Man oh man they take on the most amazing flavor and I can add them to eggs the next day for lunch or reheat in a skillet for dinner the next night as well.

Skinny Spaghetti Squash Alfredo! DELISH

I guess what I am getting at is that I need to get to a place of consistently being happy and not being so hard on myself when I do eat poorly (like this afternoon when I may or may not have eaten almost an entire sleeve of Halloween Oreo's), or to not fret if I don't make it to the gym daily. I just want to be healthy, feel good about myself, and enjoy a freaking cookie (or five) every once in a while!! I may not be at my lowest weight I have ever been but we will just say that it is because my muscles weigh an incredible amount =).

I hope everyone is having a great short work week this week. I can't believe it is already Thursday and almost the weekend again!!!!!! Josh and I are going to our very first Sporting KC game in a suite with free food and drinks! AW-Freaking-SOME!  If anyone has any super delicious recipes you'd like to share, please do so! I am always on the lookout for new ideas! =) Happy Thursday all!